Several weeks ago I was all scheduled to go for 2 ultrasounds - first an intrauterine and then a day or two later, a sonohysterogram (sp?). I went for the first, then all of a sudden Fertility Friend decided that I MIGHT have ovulated and in tandem with this I got a bit of EWCM. I decided to cancel the second ultrasound just in case I might have conceived. That was somewhere in the neighborhood of CD 60.
Now its CD 24, so clearly, I did not conceive.
Tomorrow I go back for the first ultrasound again. Wednesday I go for the 2nd. Last week I did the second set of blood work and earlier this cycle I did the CD3 blood work. I expect I will be receiving a call from Dr. Cutie soon with respect to all of this. I'm quite nervous that its all going to be bad news. That my FSH is indicative of my ovaries being dried up wastelands incapable of squeezing out anything resembling a viable ovum.
I think I'm a bit numb. I've kind of stopped thinking baby thoughts over the last couple of months. It hurt too much to think about it. I turned it off. I have a very, very bad feeling that things are not going to go my way in this... so I don't really want to get my hopes up.
What an empty feeling.
I hope that you wont get the bad news. The waiting and the frustrations and the sadness. It is too much to bear at times. Thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteI remember when my RE said we didn't have to do an HSG because after finding out Hubby had no sperm, the chances of me having an issue were slim. I said,no, we are doing it. I just had a gut feeling. Unfortunately I was right. So even though I bawled and felt my world crash down, I also was not surprised. I hope your gut feeling is wrong. HUGS.
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