AF Excuses

I find that I use AF as an excuse to drop the good habits & indulge myself for a few days.

I had a lovely date with Hubby on Friday night.  I really shared with him & he really listened.  Life is so busy for us that a couple of weeks can go by and we don't really have time to discuss whats happening in our heads and hearts with each other.  It felt REALLY good.  It helped, too, that the food was spectacular and the wine was very nice.

Saturday we had to get up and hit the road out of town as we were playing a festival.  Lovely place, nice people, sold some CDs.  We did our set, stayed like good musicians to support a couple of the acts that followed, mingled a bit, and took off to another town for a close friend of the family 50th wedding anniversary party that we were to play at as well.  We had to stop for lunch along the way & had greasy fish & chips at pretty much the only place we could find.  I only at half & still felt gross. 

The party was nice.  We stayed later than we had anticipated.  I sat in front of a campfire breathing in smoke for a good hour.  That wasn't so fun.  I resisted the cake, but had a glass of wine.  By the time we got home at 10pm we were starved & got a pizza.  More wine with that.  Then to bed.

Up at a decent time Sunday & packed a picnic.  Rode our bikes along a 20K old rail bed trail from one nearby town to another.  Gorgeous day.  It was just what my soul needed.  Took almost an hour and a half one way.  We stopped in a park at the end & ate our egg salad sandwiches, carrots & celery and some nuts & seeds.  Then we went down to the main drag of the little town & locked up our bikes & snooped around a bit.  Went into a nice cafe which appears to specialize in Fritters, where Hubby ordered a 'banana split fritter'.  I resisted & just had a couple of bites of his.  It was, as the name suggests, quite good!  There was also a chocolate shop on the strip and I HAD to go in.  I resisted buying anything, but I did take a little sample of a milk chocolate ladybug they had set out.  I am a chocolatier (just for fun, not professionally, but maybe one day I will do it professionally).  I took an intensive course & have a certificate & everything - which of course, makes me official.  Its a dangerous and expensive hobby!

Got home Sunday afternoon & had a glass of wine on the deck.  Ate some leftover pizza and drew a nice warm bath with Epsom salts & essential oils.  Read more of "Fully Fertile" while bathing.  Soon after this I was serenaded by Hubby's snores coming from the bedroom.  It was only 7:30pm!  I was feeling sleepy too, though.  After my bath I decided it was a good time to try out the whole meditation thing.  I got out some pillows to sit on, lit some incense, and put on the instructional CD.  The sun was beginning to set so the lighting in the spare room (which will one day SOON be the baby's room) was soft and lovely.  I listened softly to the gentle voice on the CD.  When the instructional portion was over I continued on listening to the music & just focusing on my breath for who knows how long.  It was...lovely.  My mind would wander & when I noticed it, I would just calmly bring myself back to 'thinking' only about my breath.  Normally I would berate myself & get angry that I'm not doing it right, but I was in such a good place that I cut myself a break on it (as you are supposed to).  It felt great.  I can definitely see how finding a place for this in my life will help keep me calm & centred (which I am normally NOT!).

I had a wonderful, long deep sleep Sunday night.

Monday morning I got up to see Dr. Jam (my new nickname for wonderful Chiropractor man!).  We reviewed all the info he gathered on our previous appointment.  WOW!  My lower spine is over curved & we need to bring that back a bit.  My pelvis is tilted to the left, while my shoulders & neck tilt to the right to compensate.  From the top of my shoulders to the base of my skull that section of spine should be gently curved, but mine is poker straight.  He said that he'd never seen one so perfectly straight - you could seriously put a level on it!  It was totally clear and obvious from the xrays which he showed me.  Nerves in that section affect the pituitary & thyroid, while in the lower part of my back & pelvis is obviously reproductive organs.  Yes - I am highly blocked.  He's going to open me up!  Again, the scanny test results were obvious & clear, and I am also quite flat footed, which will impede my response to the adjustments (he will adjust me, I walk around for a few days on flat feet & my body starts to re-compensate again....no progress).  So....orthotics it is, as well as adjustments 3x per week for now which will give us two steps forward, one step back in terms of progress.  It will be a long haul to 'unjam' me, but whatever the result, I will only glean positive health impacts from this.  The first adjustment was a little uncomfortable but I felt marvelous afterwards.  My chronically tender lower back had NO PAIN for almost half the day Monday which was amazing to me!  In a couple of weeks maybe I'll get to a whole pain free day!

Last night I went to see that Bridesmaids movie at the theatre with my mom, Aunt & cousins, and I had popcorn & tea for supper.  Regretted that at 10pm.  Hysterical movie though!  Got home, finished the bottle of wine, plopped in front of the TV till midnight & went to bed.  Not the routine I'm supposed to be following.

Today I'm back on the proverbial horse.  Healthy breakfast, vitamins & herbs, healthy packed lunch, yoga after work...Hopefully a relaxing evening with some meditation worked in there.

I feel like I'm moving forward....I just have to control my unhealthy urges more effectively!

Establishing the Starting Line

I guess the best way to ensure my journey is documented thoroughly is to capture where I am today.

Diet - Mostly vegetarian, as my husband is a vegetarian. He does eat fish, so we eat a lot of fish. Salmon in particular is his favorite. Just because I don't eat a lot of animal flesh, however, does not mean I have a particularly healthy diet. I try, but I'm easily tempted because I love food. I love to cook and try new recipes and I tend to eat restaurant sized portions - so basically way too much. I do find food very comforting & soothing.

I try to incorporate lots of "healthy" food into our diets. I eat a lot of salads, fresh fruit & vegetables, lots of legumes, whole grains. There is still lots of stuff that I'm learning needs to be eliminated from the cupboards in the way of processed foods. Also soy - we eat a lot of soy and I'm finding out more and more that there are as many reasons to cut out the soy as there are to cut out meat altogether!

We are not vegan - we do eat dairy, eggs, honey.

I'm understanding more and more that what we believe, or are led to believe are healthy foods are in fact nothing of the sort. Its not just what we eat, but where it comes from and how its produced that matters. I might think that I'm eating a bowl of nutritious cereal, but the milk is full of hormones from mistreated and malnourished cows, and the grains are genetically modified and nutritionally deficient.

Anyway - back to the task at hand, my current diet. In the summertime, I have a vegetable garden and I grow much of what we eat. Tomatoes, beans, peas, beets, lettuce, radishes, kale, cabbage. I preserve what we can't eat fresh. I live in an agriculturally rich area in South Western Ontario. We have a thriving farming community and a famous farmers market, so access to fresh, wholesome food is good most of the year. We do lots of 'pick your own' at local farms & preserve it.

Nevertheless, my cupboards still have crackers, chips, cheezies (my downfall - and what are they but chemicals and corn! I'm learning...), ice cream, chocolate, wine, rum, etc. I don't generally buy organic because we don't have a lot of money and its expensive. I am addicted to MacDonald's breakfast and eat that more often than I care to mention. We eat out a lot because we are musicians and are often on the road and meals are often a part of our 'deal' with the venues. Its hard to know where the food comes from in a bar. Generally I think - not a good place.

We've both successfully eliminated smoking (my husband 5 years, me 3.5 years) and coffee (2+years).

We both have a leaning towards nutritional, ethical eating, but never really did much research & are not well educated on it. We are becoming more so (which is what has spawned this blog in the first place).

I drink a lot of green tea (again, not organic, and as I write & think about what I put in my body I'm realizing all the things that need to change!), make my own sprouts (lentil, chick pea, mung bean, radish, sunflower, etc etc...), choose whole grain where I have control over it (ie: I can't control it in a frozen pizza, and yes, we eat them. I know.), I take a multivitamin, drink a smoothie with green powder and hemp seeds for breakfast.

So basically I'm thinking the diet is about 80% bad, but the intention behind it is about 50% good if we would just eat organic produce alone.

So that's move #1 on the diet front. Nothing more comes into this house that is not organic and/or that is genetically modified. I have to learn more about the gmo thing because I'm not sure about labelling in Canada & how that works. I think making the organic/non gmo change alone will be a significant step.

On the front of exercise, currently I give myself about a 6 out of 10. I am somewhat moderately active. I actually exercise, with the point of it being formally for exercise, about once per week. I do yoga, I'm starting to run a bit (though I'm not very good at it), and I like to ride my bike - trail riding mostly. I stay pretty active with yard work and house work otherwise. My husband and I walk a lot, particularly from about May through October before winter sets in. We still walk in the winter, just less. Our shows for music can be considered physical activity too. I would like to increase my physical activity for endurance, strength & flexibility. I'd also like to fit back into my size 6 clothes that have been packed away for 4 years.

That brings me to the measurement side of things. As much as I hate it, numbers are indicators of health. I'm not going to share the numbers - lets just say they are not where I want them to be. I will say that I want to lose 35 lbs and 3 to 4 dress sizes.

I am not looking at this as a weight loss program, though. This is a complete change in my lifestyle. This is digging out all the crap and becoming who I truly am. I am an ethical person. I don't want to support massive 'food' growing operations (animal or vegetable) that deplete the planet, mistreat and underpay workers, provide nutritionally deficient and even detrimental so-called food. I've just had blinders on - not wanted to admit what I kind of already knew, if only I'd do the work to learn more. I want to live a long, vital life, sharing my gifts and loving my friends and family. The weight loss is not what I am focusing on, though I believe wholeheartedly that it will be a side effect of the changes.

So that's the 'where I'm at' summary. This week's step is going to be to change the way I shop. Any food that is purchased and brought into this house will be organic. We can't afford to clean out the cupboards completely and restock them from scratch....we have to transition. I wonder how long before the turnover is complete?

Bye for now.
~SS